WWE World Heavyweight Championship Steel Cage Match
Seth Rollins (C) w/ J&J Security vs Randy Orton (the RKO is "banned")
>um yeah...well since a steel cage match is a no DQ match "anything" goes...therefore expect multiple RKO's by Randy Orton like his 5 Monday Night on Raw...despite all of that somehow "gatekeeper" Kane helps Rollins keep the title
Intercontinental Championship
Daniel Bryan (C) vs Bad News Barrett
>well here we go again, this match is only a go if Bryan is healthy enough...if so I expect he retains, otherwise WWE could plan for Barrett to go over and regain the title so that Bryan doesn't have to forfeit it like the WWE World title last year
United States Championship Russian Chain Match
John Cena (C) vs Rusev w/Lana
>Russian Chain = Bull Rope = Indian Strap = Dog Collar...been there, seen them all...you must incapacitate your opponent enough to touch all four corners in succession...Cena wins...ho hum
Divas Championship
Nikki Bella (C) w/Brie Bella vs Naomi
>Naomi's attack of Paige over in England forced her out of this match and could allow for this new more vicious former funka-dactyl to get the victory and become Divas Champ here in this one
Chicago Street Fight
Dean Ambrose vs Luke Harper
>The Lunatic Fringe vs a former Wyatt Family member who is bit out of sorts himself...this will be an all-out war...and have Ambrose come out with the win
Last Man Standing
Roman Reigns vs Big Show
>enough with these two going at it already...Reigns wins...and hopefully moves on to a feud with...Bray Wyatt (because I believe Bray is referring to Roman in the last few weeks)
Kiss Me Arse Match
Dolph Ziggler vs Sheamus
>um what?...they really couldn't think of anything better for these two men's budding feud...Sheamus gets the win and forces Ziggy to kiss his...
WWE Tag-Team Championship Kick-off Match
Cesaro and Tyson Kidd (C) w/Natalya vs The New Day: Kofi Kingston and Big E w/ Xavier Woods
>yet again the Tag-Team titles are relegated to the kick-off contest...but I think it might be time for a change...when New Day becomes the New Champs...the "Freebird" rule will be in full effect
Seth Rollins (C) w/ J&J Security vs Randy Orton (the RKO is "banned")
>um yeah...well since a steel cage match is a no DQ match "anything" goes...therefore expect multiple RKO's by Randy Orton like his 5 Monday Night on Raw...despite all of that somehow "gatekeeper" Kane helps Rollins keep the title
Intercontinental Championship
Daniel Bryan (C) vs Bad News Barrett
>well here we go again, this match is only a go if Bryan is healthy enough...if so I expect he retains, otherwise WWE could plan for Barrett to go over and regain the title so that Bryan doesn't have to forfeit it like the WWE World title last year
United States Championship Russian Chain Match
John Cena (C) vs Rusev w/Lana
>Russian Chain = Bull Rope = Indian Strap = Dog Collar...been there, seen them all...you must incapacitate your opponent enough to touch all four corners in succession...Cena wins...ho hum
Divas Championship
Nikki Bella (C) w/Brie Bella vs Naomi
>Naomi's attack of Paige over in England forced her out of this match and could allow for this new more vicious former funka-dactyl to get the victory and become Divas Champ here in this one
Chicago Street Fight
Dean Ambrose vs Luke Harper
>The Lunatic Fringe vs a former Wyatt Family member who is bit out of sorts himself...this will be an all-out war...and have Ambrose come out with the win
Last Man Standing
Roman Reigns vs Big Show
>enough with these two going at it already...Reigns wins...and hopefully moves on to a feud with...Bray Wyatt (because I believe Bray is referring to Roman in the last few weeks)
Kiss Me Arse Match
Dolph Ziggler vs Sheamus
>um what?...they really couldn't think of anything better for these two men's budding feud...Sheamus gets the win and forces Ziggy to kiss his...
WWE Tag-Team Championship Kick-off Match
Cesaro and Tyson Kidd (C) w/Natalya vs The New Day: Kofi Kingston and Big E w/ Xavier Woods
>yet again the Tag-Team titles are relegated to the kick-off contest...but I think it might be time for a change...when New Day becomes the New Champs...the "Freebird" rule will be in full effect
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